i’ve been going to my local bar for years and never had a problem. so i was there tonight and had enjoyed 4 or 5 beers with my husband while sitting at the bar in a high bar stool. my back started to hurt since i am 7 months pregnant and i have sit uncomfortably on those bar stools, so i asked the bar tender if i could bring a normal, short chair with a back over from one of the tables. he said no and told me that only tall stools were allowed at the bar itself. is that discrimination against me because i am pregnant? if i was disabled and in a wheelchair then i don’t think they could tell me that i can’t be by the bar, and there’s not much difference between that and a person in a normal chair

A small balding man storms into a local bar and demands, "Gimme a double of the strongest whiskey you got. I’m so mad, I can’t even see straight." The bartender, noticing that the little man is a bit the worse for wear, pours him a double of Southern Comfort. The man swills down the drink and says, "Gimme another one." The bartender pours the drink, but says, "Now, before I give you this, why don’t you let off a little steam and tell me why you’re so upset?"

So, the man begins his tale. "Well, I was sitting in the bar next door, when this gorgeous blonde slinks in and actually sits beside me at the bar. I thought, "Wow, this has never happened before." You know, it was kind of a fantasy come true. Well, a couple of minutes later, the blonde leans over and asks if I’d like to come back to her hotel to have dinner and talk for a while. I couldn’t believe this was happening, and I hadn’t had a good meal in quite a while. I managed to nod my head yes, so she grabs my hand and starts walking out of the bar. This seemed just too good to be true."

He continued, "She took me down the street here to a nice hotel and up to her room. She said to relax, watch some TV, and that she would be ready to go down to the restaurant in a few minutes. But, as soon as I put my feet up and reclined my chair, I heard some keys jingling and someone starts fumbling with the door."

"The blonde says, ‘Oh my god, it’s my boyfriend. He must have lost his wrestling match tonight, he’s gonna be real mad. Quick, hide!’"

"So, I opened the closet, but I figured that was probably the first place he would look, so I didn’t hide there. Then I looked under the bed, but no, I figured he’s bound to look there, too. By now, I could hear the key in the lock. I noticed the window was open, so I climbed out and was hanging there by my fingers, praying that the guy wouldn’t see me."

The bartender says "Well I can see how you might be a bit frustrated at this point."

"Well, yeah, but I hear the guy finally get the door open and he yells out, ‘Who you been with now, you witch?’ The girl says, ‘Nobody, honey, now calm down.’"

Well, the guy starts tearing up the room. I hear him tear the door off the closet and throw it across the room. I’m thinking, ‘Boy, I’m glad I didn’t hide in there.’ Then I hear him lift up the bed and throw it across the room. Good thing I didn’t hide under there either. Then I heard him say, ‘What’s that over there by the window?’ I think, ‘Oh God, I’m dead meat now.’

But, the blonde by now is trying real hard to distract him and convince him to stop looking. Well, I hear the guy go into the bathroom and I hear water running for a long time; I figure maybe he’s gonna take a bath or something, when all of a sudden, the jerk pours a pitcher of scalding hot water out of the window right on top of my head. I mean, look at this, I got second degree burns all over my scalp and shoulders!"

The bartender says, "Oh man, that would have gotten me mad for sure." "No, that didn’t really bother me. Next, the guy starts slamming the window shut over and over on my hands. I mean, look at my fingers. They’re a bloody mess. I can hardly hold onto this glass."

The bartender looks at the guy’s hands and says, "Yeah, buddy, I can understand why you are so upset."

"No, that wasn’t what really got me so angry though."

The bartender then asks in exasperation, "Well, then, what did finally make you anger?"

"Well, I was hanging on the window, and I turned around and looked down–I was only about six inches off the ground."

I plan on being a director. So here is an idea that I thought up awhile ago.

A man is dreaming in his bed. His dream, seeming quite real, but looks quite fake, pulls him in and fully convinces him that he’s really there. It’s first person and he’s standing in a white abyss. A man appears in front of him wearing a business suit. "You’re late." "I’m sorry?" "You’re late, very late." "Late for what?" "You’re just late. Get it?" "No, I don’t. What am I late fo-"
A colossal clock tower appears behind the man in the business suit. It’s tall, and it’s covered in pipes. It’s a rusty copper color. At the very top, a clock with with many numbers and many hands is spinning, and huge black crows circle around it. It chimes very loudly, in a very "doomish" low toned chime. The crows go insane, and doors begin to appear in rows around the clock tower. for a few seconds, all the dreaming man hears his the chime, and then all the doors open at once and a huge crowd begins to poor out of the doors. The crowd starts to criss-cross about going in and out of the doors. The dreamer is being pushed around, and he is screaming and yelling and trying to talk to people on what’s going on, but he is ignored. People are screaming and yelling. Meanwhile, this is confusing, the camera switches to a huge board of all the crow’s visions. If you know what I mean. Like a big security camera screen. All the visions are red. You can see them swooping down on the crowd, stealing wrist watches, wall clocks, and strangely, people carrying grandfather clocks, running hastily, lose grip of their grandfather clocks. (This whole idea is just an experiment, not really to have a story, but to "Ooo" crowds.) This all goes on for a minute until the whole crowd has returned back into the doors, and they all slam at once. The chime ends. It’s quiet. Then, a man who was scooped up from the crowd (he swallowed a wrist watch) is dropped from the top the of clock tower. The dreaming man looks up from hearing his terrified screaming. In his curiosity, he walks forward, and the screaming slowly makes it’s way down the tower, and ends in a satisfying crunch and blood goes all over the dreamer. He looks down at himself, and he’s covered. A huge flash goes off, and he finds himself outside of a bar, but again, it’s just a bar sitting in a the middle of the white abyss. He can hear music and and laughing and talking issuing from the inside. He walks up and walks inside. It’s empty when he walks in, but he can still hear people talking. Floating beers and bottles flow around the room. Mugs slide across the bar top. The dreamer hears a crunching sound from his right, and looks down to see a pretzel floating, and being eaten. He reaches out and he hits an invisible man’s shoulder. The invisible man grunts, "Hey, you *hic* eh whatcha *hic* hit me for!" being the man is drunk, he scoots the chair, and swings a punch at the dreamer. You can imagine this all being very confusing. The dreamer finds himself in an impossible fight with an invisible man. The bar starts to scream and holler. "FIGHT! YEAH, HIT HIM!" the dreamer get’s hit over and over, and finally wakes up.

This story came to me from a dream, but it was really simple. I fixed it up myself. It’s all really weird, and I did a wee bit of improv while typing it. Sorry about the one big paragraph, I got into a typing spree.
Enjoy!
This was all original, or at least I think it is.
A bit of it came to me in a dream, so I turned it into this.
all my ideas are really strange.
I also love writing. I have a huge archive of random junk that I typed. I might put it up!

What really got me into this was the Chime from the clock tower. It sounded really creepy and strange.

Me and my mom both think my cat got bitten by a snake. She has a bump about the size of a ping pong ball on her side and whenever we try to look at it, she hisses and swats at us then runs away. My mom said that since it’s been a few days, it’s not poisonous and won’t kill her, but my cat’s still acting strange. Every time I pet her, she’ll just sit there and glare at me and when I move my hand from her to stop, she scratches me on the face or hand. Also, she jumped down off the bar one time to a chair and I was on the other side of the bar and put my hand over the side of it [no where near her] and he hissed and swatted at me again.. Please help me? This is very unusual. My cat is very loving. She won’t even eat anymore. :’( I love my kitty and I’ve been crying my eyes out.. Any vets know what might be wrong with her? Or what I could do?
Without taking her to the vet.. I really can’t afford it no matter how much I wanna take her So anything I could do at home??
I can’t take her to the vet. It’s not possible.. I’m only 15 and we barely have a place to live. I really wish I could but I can’t. My mom said she had a dog and it had a bump about a week and it lived.. Could that be the same situation?

Hey to all of you that don’t know I am a fireman but due to the low pay that firemen receive I have a second job as a waiter to help tide me by. Anyway about two weeks ago I was working at the restaurant and it was very slow(no customers) so I was sitting down in the manager’s office while he was up front hanging out at the bar. Anyway two female coworkers of mine came inside the little3 13×13 office. One sat in a chair. The other ignored a vacant chair and plopped right on my lap. She began to bounce and grind against my crotch. I just caressed her thighs and her "upper body". Of course this woke up the man in my base. I know she felt it because she moved in closer and grinded harder. The hostess came to the back and told her that she had given her some customers that walked in. They both left. The woman in the chair just stared at me and smiled. The other waitress came back and did the same thing to me again and the same thing happened again. I guess my questions are, Women why do you sit in a guys lap?, Do you expect the erection that is soon to follow, and Do you know that this type of thing happens in the back of restaurants all the time? 10 points for best thorough answer.

i’ve been dating this guy for 3 months now..we are very close (eventhough we agreed in the beginning to take things slow b/c he’s been hurt before-had his relationships end badly)…we’ve told each other pretty much everything about our lives (I know things about him that not even his parents know)

I’ve talked to his brother on the phone, he told his parents about me a month ago, and I’ve also talked to his parents on the phone a few days ago (we were hanging out at the park and he put them on speaker phone to say hi to me). I also met and hung out with his college buddies this weekend when they came into town to visit. these are his very close circle of friends..

we went out for lunch yesterday then went out again last night to play poker..when I walked into the bar where we play poker he immediately got up from his chair, wrapped me into a huge hug and said "I missed you". later that night, I was sitting at the poker table still playing (he got kicked out) and I looked at him from across the table-he smiled and winked at me.

later while we were sitting down talking, he rubbed my back, looked right into my eyes and said "I wish I didn’t have to think about you all the time" I looked at him w/a sad face and said "what’s that supposed to mean? I can not talk to you ever again then you won’t have to think about me" He smiled and said "don’t worry, it’s a good thing"

when we walked over to say goodbye to our friends, he wrapped his arm around me and pulled me into a hug..I rested my head on his chest and he squeezed me tight.

he hugged me tight again for a really long time when we said goodnight out by my car (pulled me really close to him)..he said he’d see me today and started to walk away but then came back to hug me again.

what does all this mean? do you think he wants to commit soon?

i’ve been dating this guy for 3 months now..we are very close (eventhough we agreed in the beginning to take things slow b/c he’s been hurt before-had his relationships end badly)…we’ve told each other pretty much everything about our lives (I know things about him that not even his parents know)

I’ve talked to his brother on the phone, he told his parents about me a month ago, and I’ve also talked to his parents on the phone a few days ago (we were hanging out at the park and he put them on speaker phone to say hi to me). I also met and hung out with his college buddies this weekend when they came into town to visit. these are his very close circle of friends..

we went out for lunch yesterday then went out again last night to play poker..when I walked into the bar where we play poker he immediately got up from his chair, wrapped me into a huge hug and said "I missed you". later that night, I was sitting at the poker table still playing (he got kicked out) and I looked at him from across the table-he smiled and winked at me.

later while we were sitting down talking, he rubbed my back, looked right into my eyes and said "I wish I didn’t have to think about you all the time" I looked at him w/a sad face and said "what’s that supposed to mean? I can not talk to you ever again then you won’t have to think about me" He smiled and said "don’t worry, it’s a good thing"

when we walked over to say goodbye to our friends, he wrapped his arm around me and pulled me into a hug..I rested my head on his chest and he squeezed me tight.

he hugged me tight again for a really long time when we said goodnight out by my car (pulled me really close to him)..he said he’d see me today and started to walk away but then came back to hug me again.

what does all this mean? do you think he wants to commit soon?

last night i was at the bar that my crush works at he does kerrokee there well i was dancing with some friends and this guy that is a friend of mine was singing. at the end of the guys song my crush always tells the others to clap for the singer well my crush totally messed up the singers name and jokingly i asked my crush " what up was something distracting u?" and he said yes and smile at me. also he seemed to get upset when i slow danced with this other guy accourding to one of my friends he almost fell out of his chair trying to watch what was going on. now all this happened right after i decided i had to get over my crush and try to move on because my crush has a girlfriend at least i think he still does she walked out on him at the bar last night and a friend told me it was because my crush was looking at me to much. i feel almost like i am in high school again. so now i am trying to figure out does he like me and if so what do i do next ?

You’re sitting at a bar, an explosively-dank hole in Funky Town USA.
You have an award that says, most likely to be the character in a riddle . . . looking around your attention finds a small chair with a mobile entity covering it with it’s lesser half . . . It speaks, you hear "Glass of water please . . . " You see the bartender examine the seated man for a moment. He then reaches under the counter and pulls out a shotgun point-blank in the man’s face. The seated man speaks again "Thank You" he says, and walks out of the bar . . . why did the man get what he needed?

Okay, so i’m on a student committee and we all hang out together often. One of the girls is really hot, quite outgoing and flirty. She mentioned something about a boyfriend, but not being happy with him. She normally talks a lot to me and I enjoy her company. Okay I do like her, though I’m not sure whether its just being close to her as a friend cos she’s fun or whether i fancy her. Lets call her B. Okay, so one day we were all playing cards, and I was sitting on the right side of a two seater sofa with someone else on my left, who wasn’t really paying attention. There’s a chair right next to me on my right side. She came into the upstairs room a bit late and sat on that chair on my right side.

As we all began to play cards and watch tv, the others are around the table in front of me, sort of half looking at the tv more than the cards, she sort of leant against the back of her chair facing me (though looking down at her cards and the tv) and bent her knees over my armrest and… put her feet onto my lap. My right arm was sort of loosely trapped between the outside of the sofa and her thighs. B sort of put her right foot on the inside of my thigh.. pretty close to my crotch and her left… well sort of on top of my crotch! Look I don’t know whether it was intentional or well.. I don’t know.. or whether she was just resting her feet, being her normal bubbly cheeky self.

Okay, I did enjoy the sensation of her feet resting on me.. and I was a little turned on my her right foot which (perhaps I imagined though) was gently moving this way and that to and fro my crotch. I didn’t say anything or react, just kept playing cards.. I sort of felt her push my hand which was on the outer arm rest into the arm rest so it was literally touching her thigh. I didn’t know what to do! I mean, there were others around too! I didn’t know whether anyone was really paying attention.. then my phone rang on loud and I had to sort of get up and leave the room!! By the time I got back the moment was sort of gone.. we all had to go, she had taken my place on the chair watching tv with the others..

I don’t know whether she was trying to suggest something to me.. in one of our student events, one day she sort of did a similar thing at a bar when we took the students out to. It was only for a few minutes, before we were interrupted and all had to leave, but she sort of sat on the stool next to me and put her legs over mine to touch the floor.

Okay.. I’m sort of turned on by her other times, but I do actually like being close to her.. just not ready for a relationship and she has a boyfriend! It’s been a month now, just the other day though we were all sitting together in a more open setting, this time she sat next to me and asked out loud whether she could sort of rest her feet on me, but that’s what the others were doing on the sofa lounging around. This time though it was more of a simple putting her feet out cos she wanted to lie down…

What do you think?

ok so i didnt really have a lot of time but i did this quick workout in about 20 minutes. do you think this is any good?

*chair raises-hold a folded chair by the legs and raise it out to eye level(difficult)

superset #1: chair front raise hold for 3 seconds..thats 1 rep…i did 3 sets of 15

right after i did 3 sets of 15,17,20 chair dips

2 minute break

superset #2: 3 sets of 10,8,6 pullups

3 sets of 15,18,20 pushups

then i took a 12 lb medicine ball and held it eye level for 1 min..rest 1 min..i did 3 sets

2 sets of bar curls with 50 lb…11 and 13 reps

after that i ate 2 rice cakes with 1 tbsp natural peanut butter

does this sound good if im trying to get cut,and in shape. i appreciate it

Mr. Kennedy starts off the PPV guaranteeing that he will beat evan bourne tonight for the US title shot next week.

Match1. Mr. Kennedy vs. Evan Bourne #1 contenders match for the US title. Kennedy runs his mouth until Bourne socks him in the mouth. This match is underway. Kennedy’s mic check gets reversed. Bourne locks in an arm bar until Kennedy makes it to the ropes. Bourne doesn’t lay off on his armbar until the ref gets to 4. Bourne is dominating this match as he hit’s a clothesline. Kennedy gets up, they battle until Kennedy hit’s a strong right hand and he goes to the top rope. Bourne dropkicks the ropes and Kennedy falls off and lands on his neck badly to the outside. The ref calls for the bell and puts the X symbol up. As Kennedy is being taken to the back, Bourne looks as he is celebrating from the top rope but he hit’s a beastly shooting star press onto the unconscious Kennedy. MVP comes out to demolish Bourne but Shelton comes out and makes the save.

Match2. MVP vs. Shelton Benjamin for the US title. This match will be falls count anywhere. MVP starts off right away going to the outside to get a steel chair. He throws it in the ring but he didn’t get in the ring fast enough. Shelton hits several chair shots on MVP. Shelton looks under the ring. He finds a table, sets it up outside the ring. MVP looks to get some pinfalls on Shelton until he reverses into a rollup. 1, 2, kickout. They brawl to the outide as MVP bashes Shelton’s head on the announcer’s table. To the other side of the ring area, MVP puts Shelton on the table that he set up earlier in the match. MVP sets up a chair in the ring, runs from the other side of the ring, jumps on the chair. And without stopping, he jumps from there to the top rope onto Shelton who was laying on the table. MVP when gets the pinfall and retains his US title.

Match3. John Morrison vs. big show for the WWE title. Big show announces before the match that he pretty much can’t lose the title. He says that Morrison is too small to beat him up. Big show dominates until he goes for a punch to Morrison but he moves out of the way and hit’s the ref. Morrison goes to work on big show, his ally, Jeff Hardy comes out and helps Morrison. Hardy hit’s a Swanton bomb. The crowd goes crazy. Jeff nudges the ref and he gets up and counts the pinfall. 1,2,3!! He gets his coveted title back by beating the world’s tallest athlete!!!

Match4. Randy Orton vs. Undertaker for the WHC in hell in a cell. These two battle from the top of the cell after Undertaker gets rammed through the cell. From the top of the cell, they exchange blows until Undertaker gains control. He throws Orton from the top of the cell to the outside!!!!!! Undertaker is laying from the top of the cell as he and Orton get up. Undertaker brings Orton back to the top. They exchange blows again but Orton gains control of the match, his RKO gets reversed into a tombstone, but that gets reversed into an RKO!!! Orton retains with a RKO from the top of the cell through the top for the pin fall.

Main event. Royal rumble match! Winner will get a title shot at Wrestlemania! The first entry is….CM punk!! He will be going up against….Kane!!!! They go at it until the 3rd entry comes in. Edge runs to the ring and gains control. 4th entry is Finlay. Finlay gets some momentum as the first person out is CM punk. Next in is Umaga as he throws Finlay out right away. Chavo is the 6th entry and Jimmy wang yang is #7. Jimmy wang yang throws chavo out. Edge then throws Jimmy out. Next entry is khali. He throws umaga and kane out. 9th entry is Henry. Khali throws him over the ropes. Edge and khali go at it until edge throws him out. Next is Festus accompanied by Jesse. 11th is JBL. Y2j comes in at #12 and eliminates JBL and edge. Palumbo who entered 13th and Jericho go at it. Next is cade, and then the intercontinental champion, Paul Burchill. Mysterio entry #16, followed by snit sky and he is out quick. Bourne in at the 18th entry. Matt Hardy, 19th, and Knox # 20. 8 are currently in the ring until kozlov is next as he eliminates Cade, Palumbo, Mysterio and Knox. Jeff Hardy is #22, then dreamer who is also out pretty quickly. Carlito is now in, then MVP. Burchill is thrown over the top by 26th entry Miz. HHH runs to the ring and eliminates miz, MVP and Matt Hardy. 28th is Hornswaggle. Cena is #29, he throws Hornswaggle out. And our last entry is…..HBK!!! The crowd goes nuts as he announced that he will be out for a few months, but that obviously isn’t true! He runs to the ring looking 100%. He throws Kozlov and Bourne out of the match. The last 4 are HBK, Cena, Jeff Hardy, and HHH. Cena goes to throw HBK out but once again has 2nd thoughts and he eliminates himself. Obviously Cena has a problem with HBK. Cena goes to the back with another spiritless look on his face. HBK throws out his former DX partner, HHH and the final 2 are HBK and Jeff Hardy. HBK hit’s a weak sweet chin music, Jeff is against the ropes, HBK then hits another one and it knocks Jeff over the ropes!!!! HBK wins the royal rumble match!!! Regal is shown in the back watching the match on TV with a disgusted look on his face. He then looks to complain to Vince but he can’t find him. He then decides to call someone and says to this unknown wrestler that he will face HBK for the wrestle mania spot on the next raw. HBK celebrates with the fans as the PPV goes off the air!
Yeah Andrew S. The only reason I made HBK win was because in my raw and smackdown fantasies before this I had an HBK storyline that he would be out for a few months, so I decided to put a nice twist in there and have him come back here and win the rumble.

Birthday Sex
Adam was talking to his friend at the bar, and he said, "I don’t know what to get my wife for her birthday – she has everything, and besides, she can afford to buy anything she wants, so I’m stuck." His friend said, "I have an idea! Why don’t you make up a certificate saying she can have 60 minutes of great sex, any way she wants it. She’ll probably be thrilled." Adam decided to listen to his friend’s advice. The next day at the bar his friend said, "Well? Did you take my suggestion?" "Yes, I did," Adam replied. "Did she like it?" "Oh yes! she jumped up , thanked me, kissed me on the forehead and ran out the door, yelling "I’ll be back in an hour!!"

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Poor Duke
A boy was meeting his girlfriend’s parents for the first time for dinner. After dinner, his girlfriend and her mother left the room to do the dishes, leaving him with the father and the dog Duke, who was sitting underneath the boy’s chair. Unfortunately, it was a large dinner and he really had to fart. He stealthily let out a quiet, but audible, fart. "Duke!" the dad yelled. "This is great!" the boy thought. "He thinks the dog is farting!" So he let out another one. "Duke!" the father barked. The boy thought he was homefree so he let everything out at once in a really loud and smelly fart. "Duke! Get out of there before the boy sh*ts on you!"

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None For You
A little boy came down to breakfast. Since he lived on a farm, his mother asked if he had done his chores. “Not yet,” said the little boy. His mother tells him he can’t have any breakfast until he does his chores. Well, he’s a little pissed, so he goes to feed the chickens, and he kicks a chicken. He goes to feed the cows, and he kicks a cow. He goes to feed the pigs, and he kicks a pig. He goes back in for breakfast and his mother gives him a bowl of dry cereal. “How come I don’t get any eggs and bacon? Why don’t I have any milk in my cereal?” he asks. “Well,” his mother says, “I saw you kick a chicken, so you don’t get any eggs. I saw you kick the pig, so you don’t get any bacon, either. I also saw you kick the cow, so you aren’t getting any milk this morning.” Just about then, his father comes down for breakfast, and he kicks the cat as he’s walking into the kitchen. The little boy looks up at his mother with a smile, and says, “Are you going to tell him, or should I?”

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S & M
One day Mom was cleaning Junior’s room and in the closet she found a bondage S&M magazine. This was highly upsetting for her. She hid the magazine until his Father got home and showed it to him. He looked at it and handed it back to her with out a word. So she asked him, "What should we do about this?" Dad looked at her and said, "Well I definately don’t think you should spank him."

Dead next to three photos.

Part 1.
Mrs. Fatima sat at her chair that stood against the yellow painted wall of the living room. The fan whirred above her, squeaking as it turned from side to side. The door of the room facing her remained closed for two months. To her right side, the kitchen smelt of rot bananas with a cup of coffee lying at the bottom of the sink since her son’s last visit, two weeks ago.

The grey light from the round lamp at the ceiling, gave a mysterious aura to Mrs. Fatima’s brown, wrinkled skin. She clicked the golden ring at the forefinger against her knee, and then raised her head to the ceiling. In her white night dress she looked a like a pride waiting for her lover to return, but a dying pride would be of no use.

She dreaded mirrors. She escaped them, afraid to see how time had misshaped her, leaving nothing of her once charming features. Beauty abandoned her. Her cheekbones stuck out under her green eyes and her nose got longer with the skin flattening at around it. Her teeth went yellow and weaker; her jaw dropped to her neck and stiffened at the edges that she could barely move it up and down to eat.

The reality of change had destroyed her life. Her husband died and her three daughters and son got married and left her to the silence of her apartment. Her body stiffened all over and her back arched forward; the front of her feet swelled. She’d feel like walking on hard wood that broke apart and stuck out, piercing through her skin.

The crying went on for four years, since the death of her husband. But by the beginning of the fifth year, she realized that there was no use. Her tears dried up and she knew that no one would ever care to watch them as they twinkled in the light of the room, falling to the ground. The tears were gone.

No one would hug her when she felt cold; no one would sleep beside her and show her how it felt to be a woman. She wondered, what was the use of pain if no one could see it?

She raised her head to the ceiling and her jaw shook as she tried to talk. “God, can you hear me?” She pressed the wooden handle of the chair. “ I cannot be alone any longer. I wish to die.”

She imagined that by tomorrow morning, Mrs. Dalia her neighbor would keep on knocking but she wouldn’t open for she‘d be dead. The neighbors would break the door and Mrs. Dalia would scream and run to her bed and hug her. She’d talk of how she visited her everyday and how she took care of her, of how she told her of her secrets and how she loved her like a mother.

Some minutes later, someone knocked at the door. Mrs. Fatima pressed her hand against the wooden handle of the chair and got to her feet. Bowing forward, she walked to the door. Her whole body shook and stiffened as she tried to steady herself. “Who’s there?” A raspy voice replied back, “Hussein, Mom.” She pushed back the lock with one finger and the door flung open. The door had newly painted white bars behind which thick, non-transparent glass stood. She could see the shadow of the one knocking, like a ghost, arriving to summon her soul.

The bathroom was so small that you couldn’t have a shower unless you were standing. The shower handle hung right above the toilet with the soap bar resting under it at the tiled floor. After having a quick shower, Hussein peed, wore back his shirt and trousers then went to his mother’s room.

Mrs. Fatima Sat at her bed, her feet crossed in the darkness and her thumbs rolling around each other in illusionary circles. Hussein sat next to her and pressed her hand gently against the bed sheet. “How are you, Mom?” She closed her eyes then tugged her hand and pressed it against her chest.

“Mom, I know how it feels to be alone. I’m doing my best. I have a job to do, kids to feed. I can’t be around here beside you all day long. Please, forgive me.” Mrs. Fatima turned her face to the wall as Hussein lowered his face to ground. “I know you feel so bad about me. You’re wondering why is life so cruel to you. I don’t have an answer. I’m sorry.” He patted her on the shoulder and went to the bed next to her.

“It’d be better if you talked to me.” He said examining the ceiling. “What the heck? Good night.” He placed the pillow over his head and after some minutes, he was snoring.

Mrs. Fatima closed her eyes and remained ever conscious to the soft hum of air outside her window.

Okay so here’s what I’m going to do over the summer, I’m going to divide my week into cardio days, strength days, off days. The strength days will be Monday, Wednesday, Friday. The cardio will be Tuesday, Thursday, Saturday. Sunday will be a break.

So for strength days I might do something like:

50 sets of 20 pushups for a total of 1,000 pushups done
50 sets of 20 frog hops (squat down like a frog and jump up) for a total of 1,000 done
50 sets of 20 flutter kicks for a total of 1,000 done

Then for cardio days I will run a mile hard.

If i do these exercises in an explosive manner and then get an intake of natural protein and carbs 15 minutes after (chocolate milk is my preferred option) will I get stronger? Main problem is I do not have a pull up bar or two bars to do tricep dips but I might be able to find a chair to do it on.