i have four bar stools with padded vynel seats that need to be upholstered is there any hints for a nice job thankx

A ten year-old boy was walking down the street when a big man on a black motorcycle, pulls up beside him and asks, "Hey kid, wanna go for a ride?" 
       
  
    "No!", said the boy, and he kept on walking. The motorcyclist pulls up to him again and says, "Hey kid,, I’ll give you if you hop on the back" 
       
    
  "NO!" said the boy and proceeded down the street a little quicker. 
       
     
 The motorcyclist pulls up to the boy again and says, "Ok kid, I’ll give you and a BIG bag of candy if you hop on the back for a ride." 
       
   
   At this point the boy turns around to him and screams angrily, "Look Dad, YOU bought the Harley, so YOU ride it!!
————
cheerful truck driver pulled up at a roadside cafe in the middle of the night for a dinner stop. Halfway through his meal, three wild- looking motorcyclists roared up–bearded, leather-jacketed, filthy. 
       
   
   For no reason at all, the selected the truck driver as a target. One poured pepper over his head, another stole his apple pie, the third deliberately tipped his coffee over. 
       
      
The truck driver never said one word, just stood up, paid his check, and left. 
       
     
 "That truck driver sure ain’t much of a fighter," sneered one of the bikers. 
       
     
 The girl behind the counter, peering out into the night, added, "He doesn’t seem to be much of a truck driver, either. He just ran his truck right over three motorcycles."
———
A biker walks into the front door of a bar. He is obviously drunk, and staggers up to the bar, seats himself on a stool and, with a belch, asks the bartender for a drink. 
       

      The bartender politely informs the man that it appears that he has already had plenty to drink, he could not be served additional liquor at this bar, and could a cab be called for him? 
       
    
  The biker is briefly surprised, then softly scoffs, grumbles, climbs down off the bar stool and staggers out the front door. A few minutes later, the same biker stumbles in the SIDE door of the bar. He wobbles up to the bar and hollers for a drink. 
       
      The bartender comes over and, still politely – but more firmly, refuses service to the man due to his inebriation, and again offers to call a cab. 
       
  
    The biker looks at the bartender for a moment angrily, curses, and shows himself out the side door, all the while grumbling and shaking his head. 
       
   
   A few minutes later, he bursts in through the BACK door of the bar. He plops himself up on a bar stool, gathers his wits and belligerently orders a drink. 
       
     
 The bartender comes over and emphatically reminds the man that he is clearly drunk, will be served no drinks, and either a cab or the police will be called immediately. 
       
  
    The surprised biker looks at the bartender, and in hopeless anguish, cries "MAAAN! How many bars do you work at?!!?

——–
A biker arrived at his bro’s house to get ready for the big run that weekend. His thoughts were on the run as he walked up to the porch, he couldn’t help but notice the hugh dog sitting next to the door. 
       
  
    When his bro answered the door he asked, "is that your dog?" 
       
   
   "Yea, I got him for the ol lady", was the response. 
       
      "No kidding. I always kept my mouth shut bout your ol lady but, I gotta say, nice trade"

——-
A dumb blonde went to a soda machine. She inserted two quarters and pushed the RED button. She heard some noise, and saw a can of Coke emerge. 
       
  
    She then started searching her large purse for some more money. About this time, a biker came up behind her, and waited patiently for her to finish. 
       
    
  She located a dollar bill and inserted it into the machine. More noises. She then pressed the Green button, and was rewarded with a can of Sprite. 
       

      She fumbled with the change in the Return slot, and put it back into the Deposit slot. She then pushed the Orange button, and received a can of Crush. 
       
  
    The biker then asked her, "Are you finished YET?" 
       
      She then replied, "Finished, Nothin’! I’m still winning!"

http://images.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://img.timeinc.net/aolhome/i/design/sl/03/05/SL0305127l_3_l.jpg&imgrefurl=http://www.southernliving.com/southern/da/result/0,24880,784319,00.html&h=240&w=320&sz=30&hl=en&start=2&um=1&tbnid=JShX-SPEdismPM:&tbnh=89&tbnw=118&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dorange%2Bliving%2Broom%26um%3D1%26hl%3Den

What color of sofa should I use. I have a black leather daybed similar to this one http://www.thefurniture.com/store/proddetail.asp?prod=Zuo-Ibiza-Daybed-500095&cat=108 and unfortunately I have to keep it in my living room even if it does not match the decor.
I have a glass TV table for my huge plasma tv. Its a rental place so I cannot change anything. There are lovely antique gold light fixtures on the walls. Also I have 2 beautiful rugs- one is a lovely navy blue rug with deep red and cream design on it and another rug that is deep red with cream on it. I dont know which rug to use. The floor is hardwood. I could buy a different rug too. I now need to tie the whole look together. Orange walls, white ceiling, blue rug. deep red rug/other rug, a black leather daybed. I am thinking abt adding a palm tree and need to get bar stools for the kitchen island and a long narrow coffee table. Its a one bedroom 850 sq ft rental.
I always wanted a tropical look but it wont work here I guess. I need lots and lots of help please.

A highly timid little man, ventured into a biker bar in the Bronx and clearing his throat asked, "Um, err, which of you gentlemen owns the Doberman tied outside to the parking meter?" A giant of a man, wearing biker leathers, his body hair growing out through the seams, turned slowly on his stool, looked down at the quivering little man and said, "It’s my dog. Why?"

"Well," squeaked the little man, obviously very nervous, "I believe my dog just killed it, sir." "What?" roared the big man in disbelief. "What in the hell kind of dog do you have?" "Sir," answered the little man, "it’s a little four week old female puppy." "Bull!" roared the biker, "how could your puppy kill my Doberman?" "It appears that your dog choked on her, sir."

A highly timid little man, ventured into a biker bar in the Bronx and clearing his throat asked, "Um, err, which of you gentlemen owns the Doberman tied outside to the parking meter?"

A giant of a man, wearing biker leathers, his body hair growing out through the seams, turned slowly on his stool, looked down at the quivering little man and said, "It’s my dog. Why?" "Well," squeaked the little man, obviously very nervous, "I believe my dog just killed it, sir." "What?" roared the big man in disbelief. "What in the world kind of dog do you have?" "Sir," answered the little man, "it’s a little four week old female puppy." "Bull!" roared the biker, "how could your puppy kill my Doberman?" "It appears that your dog choked on her, sir."

funny?

A timid little man ventured into a biker bar and, clearing his throat, asked, "Um, which of you gentlemen owns the Doberman tied outside to the parking meter?" A giant of a man, wearing biker leathers, his body hair growing out through the seams, turned slowly on his stool, looked down at the quivering little man and said, "It’s my dog. Why?" "Well," squeaked the little man, obviously nervous, "I believe my dog just killed it, sir." "What?" roared the big man in disbelief. "What in the hell kind of dog do you have?" "Sir," answered the little man, "it’s a little four week old female puppy." "Bull!" roared the biker, "How could your puppy kill my Doberman?" The man said, "It appears your dog choked on her, sir."

Ok, this is just a random story idea I came up with off the top of my head. If it’s no good, I want to know now so I don’t write more and realize it totally sucks. Constructive criticism?

Black. The color of night, of darkness, of demons and devils. Everything was black here. The clothes, the lights, even the music sounded black. Leave it to Gabe to negotiate a place such as this, a place where we would stick out like sore thumbs, our gold hair flashing like traffic lights in the glare from the disco ball. I’d just barely been able to convince dad to let us dress in dark colors.
I stuffed a baseball cap over my short hair, laughing to myself. Angels in black, dad must be loving that.
Keeping a firm grip on Gabe’s hoodie I dragged him through the crowd, searching for the darkness among the black, a spot where even the strobe lights failed. I was sure they could see us already; to their eyes we must shine like stars plucked from the night. Angels never did learn to be discreet.
“Smells like demon,” Gabe whispered in my ear, just loud enough to be heard above the music.
“Then we must be getting close.”

Lilith tapped styled nails against the tabletop next to her drink, the beat running against the music, but somehow more powerful. With her other hand she fiddled with one of her ear piercings, brushing back her black and red hair to do so.
“They’re late,” she snapped, crossing her legs, though how she could with pants as tight as hers I had no idea.
“They’re coming, can’t you see them?” I told her, trying to discreetly copy her movements.
“Shut up Luc, I don’t have the sight, remember?” she hissed, downing the rest of her drink in one go.
Giving up on attempting to cross my legs I lifted my beer, gulping down some less out of thirst and more out of boredom. Idly I played with the cap, sending it spinning in circles. The glow was getting closer now; I caught a brief glimpse of Sera’s face among the humans, a cap casting a shadow over her features. Gabe was behind her, a huge black hoodie sagging on his shoulders. Their dad must be loving that.

We broke through the crowd when we reached the bar, the darkness almost a tangible thing, though I knew I was the only one who could see it. Gabe didn’t have the sight. Luc was closest, spread out across two stools, beer in one hand, cap in the other. There was a devilish smile on his face, his shaggy black hair hiding one of his crimson eyes. He wore a tight black tee over baggy black jeans, one muscled arm raised in greeting.
“Hey, ‘sup Sera, Gabe,” he laughed, setting the bottle on the counter.
Lilith bristled from behind him. I took a moment to study her. She was as beautiful as her brother was handsome, long black and red hair, piercings on her ears and eyebrows, a frown on her lips. She wore tight black jeans and heeled boots, along with a leather jacket and tank top.
“Get to the point, dad says we’re to be in and out in less than an hour, and it takes longer to rise than it does to fall,” I said, perching lightly on a stool next to Luc. I’d always preferred him to his sister.
“It’s just a letter than needs delivering,” Luc said, pulling a blank white envelope out of his pocket, no address, no name, nothing. But I knew who it was for.
I snorted. “And this requires us how? Tell your dad to get an imp if he needs a messenger.”
“It’s of the utmost importance, trust me, he likes us meeting as much as your dad does, he wouldn’t do it if he had another option.”

I watched as she took the letter with a look of disgust, like it carried some disease. But nevertheless she slipped it into the pocket of her sweatshirt. Gabe just stared at it blankly. Never much for talking that one, I don’t think I’d ever heard him string two words together. His sister was much more interesting and I had to admit, though dad would flay me alive if he heard I’d even thought it, beautiful. She had short blond, pixie style hair and delicate features. Her lips were huge and as she chewed them in anxiety, I had the strongest urge to kiss them.
I shook my head minutely, trying to get my brain back in working order. She might be beautiful but she was an angel, dad would kill me and then send me to tally souls for a century or so. Deskwork. Shudder.
“We’ll be going then,” she said, grabbing her brother’s arm and pulling him away into the crowd.
I watched her go, watched her glance back not once, but twice, confusion playing with her face. I smiled to myself. Maybe soul-counting would be worth it. Just to feel those lips on mine.
I don’t mind if you don’t like it, say that, I just need honest answers.

And the names are my bad joke.
Sorry if it’s at all confusing, it’s stuff that would be explained later on if I wrote more.

Imagine you’re in a pub, or at the disco, or a public room. There are several women you could hang with, both there are some who catch your attention more:
- The vamp. She’s hot and glamorous, sitting at the bar stool in a feminine, classy dress. She sips her drink, talking graciously with her suitors. She seems not interested by anything or anyone in particular, she’s fully aware of being so hot, she likes to flirt but she’s searching for someone special
- The bimbo. Frilly and feisty, high heels and short skirt, she’s shaking her booty on the dance floor, giggling and smiling, hoping for a fast and quick one night stand, blowing kisses and teasing just for the sake of it
- The barmaid. She’s way bored. Bored of listening the same bull**** over and over, bored of being chat up. She has a leather jacket hung behind her, and a motocycle ready to carry you with her, if she likes you
- The wallflower. She sits quietly, reading a book. She’s really lovely, but not "dressed to kill"

My new living room has dark wooden floors and peach walls with lovely brass fixtures. Its a one bedroom apartment but the living room is a very good size. It has french windows with light taupe curtains, a black leather daybed, a huge taupe sofa, a dark brown wood and glass coffee table, huge 50 inch plasma TV (still have to buy its stand), 2 black end tables, 2 bar stools white and dark wood.
Now you must have noticed the dark color scheme. I want to liven it up with some brighter shades. I like deep reds and was thinking that would look great. I put a deep red persian rug under the daybed and it looks cool. I need to know what else can I get. I would love to add plants and a huge fake palm tree would look good. I have a life size white tiger soft toy with cubs and it looks very cool. I was thinking I could add that in a corner with the palm tree. Any suggestions on how to display it? Also is there a need for a dining table. There is a some space for it but I wanted the 2 seater ones but not a bistro. Any suggestions where I could find it and whether they are a good idea?
I just needs lots of help.
God Bless

It has a clubhouse with a plasma tv, a wii, a full kitchen and a fire place. The barn is amazing! The stalls have automatic waters and the walls are spotless. The watching area for the arena has leather chairs, a sofa, and a table and it has a bunch of bar stools lined up in front of a huge opening on the rail. and the lockers are huge and they are cherry wood and there are automatic locks . there is matting EVERYWHERE the horses could possibly walk. It is perfect…except it is 20 minutes away and its 850 a month….thats 1200 more a year then where were at…..
they turn your horse out for 4 hours a day, they blanket, and do supps at no additional charge
BTW IM 12

ok…so their is this new barn. Omg its paradise. It has a clubhouse with a plasma tv, a wii, a full kitchen and a fire place. The barn is amazing! The stalls have automatic waters and the walls are spotless. The watching area for the arena has leather chairs, a sofa, and a table and it has a bunch of bar stools lined up in front of a huge opening on the rail. and the lockers are huge and they are cherry wood and there are automatic locks . there is matting EVERYWHERE the horses could possibly walk. It is perfect…except it is 20 minutes away and its 850 a month….thats 1200 more a year then where were at…..i need to convince my parents to move what should i say?
and btw im 12

when i looked down in the bar stool next to my friend i saw a leather binder with no i.d. in it of any kind inside of it was a bank envelope with 5,200.00 in it i gave it to the bartender then tried to see if we could find out who it belonged to an hour later a man came in and it was his money after he got his money back he bought me a 2 dollar beer for my good deed i personally thought that was very shitty dont get me wrong i didnt return it for the reward which there was none i did it because it was the right thing to do but i would have given no less than a 100 dollar bill if not to he was a very lucky man that i found it most of the people i told about this said they would not have returned it what do you think????

It has a leather or vynal back rounded and leather or vyinal cushion and medal legs and round at the botton and swivals and no arm rest can anyone help me? I live in Ohio and would like to pay no more than 50 to 100 a peice she wants 3.

I just bought a new living room set. Sofa, love seat and chair pictured here: http://www.globalfurnitureusa.com/popup.php?id=1147&cat_id=6&page=&contain_id=1

I would have preferred brown leather pieces, but I got a great deal on the black set. My furniture is an expresso finish. I’ve seen this paired with black leather in other furniture (chairs and bar stools) and have seen a similar table paired with a black leather set and a rust colored carpet, so I know they can worh together, but dont know how best to "marry" the brown and black pieces. I’m guessing I should use throws and pillows, but not sure what colors would be best.

The sofa, loveseat and chair are black leather. Furniture is expresso. Walls are eggshell white. Carpeting is a taupe. (this is a rental so I’d prefer not to paint the walls)

What colors would be a good choice? Any suggestions where I can buy the throws and pillows?
Just to clarify the brown expresso furniture that I’m referring isn’t another couch or chair. The expresso pieces are wooden side tables, coffee table, and a tv stand.

i need to order leather for bar stools that take one yard of leather and the leather is sold by the hide…