Problematic adult sister with possible ADHD?

Friday, February 12th, 2010 at 2:22 am

My sister is a year and a half older than me, but acts 10 years younger. She is the mother of two children, recently separated from her husband of 8 years (he left her because of the way that she is). She is messy (never sweeps/mops, furniture is covered in food and stains, clothes all over the house. she always has at least 4 animals in her house and it reeks like litter, the animals also continuously have fleas and matting in their fur…it looks like an episode of Hoarders). She sits around all day and watches tv or sits at the computer. Only calls our mother or myself when she wants something (ie to watch the kids while she goes out to a bar or she needs money "for bills" aka booze/smokes) or to whine and complain about even the smallest issues. I try to listen, give her advice (especially when it comes to money management) however, if she doesnt like to hear it she will hang up. Recently, I have become engaged and am expecting my first child. She doesnt call with Big Sister advice or to see how i’m doing…instead, its more drama about her ex or her kids, etc. I’m fine without her advice as i have great support from friends and other family, but its very stressful when all i want is for her to be happy and not so….jealous. She exhibits all the signs of ADHD but thinks that nothing is wrong with her. Is there anything that I can do to get her to see that she needs help to be truly happy? Getting her to see a therapist is out of the question….Should I cut ties with her even if it means she won’t let me see my niece and nephew again? Please help.

Tagged with: 10 years • 8 years • adhd • big sister • booze • clothes • fleas • fur • google • hoarders • money management • mops • niece and nephew • quot • script type • stains • sweeps • text javascript • ties • watches tv

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One Comment

Hopefully Helpful says:

February 12, 2010 at 2:22 am

What a tough situation. Maybe your parents can have a talk with her about getting professional help. If she seems depressed at times, it’s at these times when you would be more likely to convince her to get help. See her only when you have to see her. If she is extremely difficult to be with, you may want to stop seeing her. I hope things will work out for the both of you. Best Wishes for a healthy baby.

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Problematic adult sister with possible ADHD?

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