This may be long and Im very sorry!
Im 21 and my now ex is 28.met and it was love at first sight! He literally took my breath away, something I have NEVER felt before in my entire life. I knew from day one that he was the one… he had been married once before when he was 22 because she was pregnant with his son. he was then married again when i met him, but had filed for divorce but still living with his wife. I cut all ties and said I was not going to date someone who was married let alone living with her, Within 4 days, he had found an apartment, told his wife he was leaving and all contact was cut. He is from England and had nothing here in the states so when he moved into the apartment,Everything he had was under his wifes name because she was American. he had his clothes and a tv, so we started a life together, fast! within a month I had moved into his apartment and we had purchased furniture and made it our own.within the first year we got two kittens, and two dogs. everything was perfect.
The next year, we decided to purchase a home and this is when everything went downhill. He paid for everything, I mean everything and he never had a problem with it, at first he liked providing. I would pay for things when i could but I only worked part time and was a full time student. I paid the utilities when i could, but i did a lot of the grocery shopping or getting him his starbucks daily. When we moved into the house,things became more expensive and stressful on him. We began to argue about stupid things, which i believe stemmed from our financial issues. it got so bad that we began spending less time together. I know that I have an anger problem, so i would scream at him while he would give me the silent treatment, we did not communicate as well as we once had. I held grudges where he just needed space and I was never good at giving him his space.
We are both insecure and extremely jealous people, but it never was a huge issue because we were both so similar. because he came form the UK, he didnt have any friends here where I did, so eventually i got tired of not being able to talk to my friends and seeing them. He also wanted to control what i was wearing and didnt like that i spent an hour to do my hair and make up and get ready when we would do things, i wanted to look good for him! We are both attractive people and I was so scared of losing him (girls loved him, and his accent didnt help) so i wanted to make sure I was always attractive to him.
The straw that broke the camels back- he went out one night without me, said he would be home at 11 but wasnt until 1. he was at the bar across the street from my work. I stopped over there on my way home from work and saw him talking to two girls and one guy outside and freaked! We got in a huge fight and I broke up with him. It was the worst fight we ever had. The next morning we talked it out.A week later he left me and said he couldnt get over how I acted. I moved back home to my parents.
He broke up with me and didnt talk much for two months.I was devestated. I loved him and wanted him back. His birthday is new years, I asked him to a movie the night before (I had plans on new years) and he said yes. we went to "our" house after the movie and i ended up sleeping there and yes, we slept together. He asked me over on New years (his bday) but like i said i made prior plans. He was upset and accused me of being with someone else. over the next month we were hanging out and sleeping together and seeing how things were going. until… I found out that he was talking to two other girls, one who happened to go to my college who told me everything! She was 18 and worked at the local starbucks and he went in there everyday for his coffee and asked her for her number. the other woman, a 26 year old with two kids going through a divorce, was a regular at starbucks, she asked him for his number. He lied to me about it until I had proof of texts and emails from these women. I ended our "fling." Two weeks later he contacted me and apologized and showed me that he stopped contact with them. We got back together officially for a month, things werent going well. He was so distant and off with me, but he came to me to ask me back!!!!
A month later, he left me again and said that the spark was gone and he felt no chemistry. He said he loved me as a friend and that he still cares about me but isnt in love. I made the biggest mistake ever and begged and pleaded for him to try! I wouldnt let it be and it pushed him so far away that he said there is never a chance! its been two weeks now and he tells me he is going on a date tonight! Im physically sick and want him back! Moving on is not an option. I was so strong but now im desperate! I broke down and now he is annoyed and furious with me that i didnt drop it and move on and leave him to his space. He said i pushed him away by smothering him
HELP ME PLEASE! I need advice to get him back!!
Also, He still talks to me he still will help me with things that i ask such as moving or help with my computer.
And all this drama never occurred until the last 3 months of our relationship. we were perfect for a year and 9 months with no issues ever!
12 hours ago
one more thing! SORRY!
He never gave a past girlfriend another chance! He always said that they are an ex for a reason, i never beleive that, i beleive you can work through anything. He also said when we got back together that he saw a huge change and me and that i was perfect for that month, but he couldnt explain why he couldnt get the spark back.
IM VERY NERVOUS ABOUT HIM DATING AND FINDING SOMEONE ELSE!
okay im done now.